{"product_id":"burn-bag-koozie","title":"Burn Bag Koozie","description":"Burn Bag Drink Koozie\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nKeep your beverage colder than a FOIA denial with the Classified Burn Bag Drink Koozie. Designed to look like the final resting place of highly sensitive paperwork, this koozie protects your drink with all the discretion of a windowless basement office and all the charm of a government form nobody read properly.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nPerfect for backyard briefings, tailgates, office morale events, or quietly judging someone’s unsecured beverage handling procedures. Just slide in your can, crack it open, and enjoy refreshment so classified even the ice cubes are on a need-to-know basis.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nFeatures:\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nLooks like a classified burn bag, minus the paperwork panic\u003cbr\u003e\nKeeps drinks cold during long meetings, short briefings, and questionable decisions\u003cbr\u003e\nGreat gift for intel folks, military nerds, government employees, and anyone who says “per my last email” with tactical intent\u003cbr\u003e\nPairs well with caffeine, sarcasm, and mild operational ambiguity\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nWarning: Do not actually place classified material inside. It’s a koozie, not a career recovery plan.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\n• Made from neoprene \u003cbr\u003e\n• Waterproof\u003cbr\u003e\n• Dual-size customization\u003cbr\u003e\n• Ribbed seams\u003cbr\u003e\n• Regular 5″ × 4″ (12 × 10 cm), or slim 6.5″ × 3.2″ (17 × 8 cm)\u003cbr\u003e\n• Spot clean as needed\u003cbr\u003e\n• Blank product sourced from China and printed in the US\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nThis product is made on demand. No minimums.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nThis product is made especially for you as soon as you place an order, which is why it takes us a bit longer to deliver it to you. Making products on demand instead of in bulk helps reduce overproduction, so thank you for making thoughtful purchasing decisions!\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nAge restrictions: For adults\u003cbr\u003e\nEU Warranty: 2 years\u003cbr\u003e\nOther compliance information: Meets the lead, cadmium, phthalates, BPA, Organostannic, azo dyes, formaldehyde, and flammability level requirements.\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003cbr\u003e\nIn compliance with the General Product Safety Regulation (GPSR), \u003cb\u003eOak inc.\u003c\/b\u003e and \u003cb\u003eSINDEN VENTURES LIMITED\u003c\/b\u003e ensure that all consumer products offered are safe and meet EU standards. For any product safety related inquiries or concerns, please contact our EU representative at \u003cb\u003egpsr@sindenventures.com\u003c\/b\u003e. You can also write to us at \u003cb\u003e123 Main Street, Anytown, Country\u003c\/b\u003e or\u003cb\u003e Markou Evgenikou 11, Mesa Geitonia, 4002, Limassol, Cyprus.\u003cb\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e","brand":"SheWantsTheISRD","offers":[{"title":"Regular 12 oz","offer_id":54149888540982,"sku":"8461300_19461","price":8.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Slim 12 oz","offer_id":54149888573750,"sku":"8461300_19462","price":8.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0754\/4668\/1910\/files\/can-cooler-white-regular-12-oz-front-6a3c76ab0cdaf.jpg?v=1782347445","url":"https:\/\/shewantstheisrd.myshopify.com\/products\/burn-bag-koozie","provider":"SheWantsTheISRD","version":"1.0","type":"link"}